Don’t go chasing waterfalls. Please stick to the rivers and the lakes that you’re used to. – TLC
‘Freedom of expression’ is arguably the most misinterpreted and abused right in the world. Someone, I just don’t remember who, summed it up perfectly when they said, “The right to express yourself ends where your nose begins”. Sadly, there’s a bunch of people who don’t subscribe to this mentality and are hell-bent on stretching their expressions to places their noses will never catch a whiff of.
The most notable (read annoying) of this huge bunch are those who decided that the best way to express themselves is through the written word. You don’t even have to think about the last time you came across one because badly-written articles, stories, blogs and books are everywhere. Countless internet bloggers should get the Van Dammesque power of my kick but my blood reaches boiling point when I think of the number of inept authors, advertising copywriters, poets, songwriters, scriptwriters, journalists, hip hop artists, etc
From the Bible (In the beginning was the Word…), Shakespeare (To be or not to be…), fairy tales (pick any) to your local daily; written word continues to have a profound effect on countless lives. It’s simple, if it’s well penned and. to a certain extent, relevant, its power knows no boundaries. How these people overlook this fact baffles me. That some of them get paid to spew their bullshit our way is a discussion I don’t even want to get into!
It’s sad to see them overlooking the magic that writing can bring. Instead of tintinnabulations, the bells in their missives ring, their cows graze in the Free State July; nearby flower vases explode seconds after the gun goes ‘bam!’; ‘strange’ rhymes with ‘orange’ and in extreme cases, their people they run!
In an attempt to understand their actions, I narrowed it down to the following reasons:
- Lack of guidance during formative years
School is the first place where writers separate themselves from, um, non-writers. Like Shakira’s hips, those 40% aggregates in comprehension and grammar tests didn’t lie. They were a clear warning that little Matthew is very dangerous with a pen in hand and that he’s better off carving desks and shelves in the Woodwork class! Imagine if teachers across the country played a more active role in guiding the learners to fields where their natural ability will carry them through. And it would really do this world so much good if they drum it into the learners’ heads that THE PEN IS MIGHTIER THAN THE SWORD.
- The peanut gallery
This is me and you; the consumers who peck at these people’s work and never come clean with them. Sometimes we don’t wanna hurt their feelings or we pray quietly that their next instalment will be better. More often than not, we shake ourselves from post-consumption disgust and, with a big grin, high-five them for their efforts. A colleague describes a friend who is a hip hop artist: “He calls himself ‘the bee’s knees in the hip hop universe’. Seeing him on stage is embarrassing. During one freestyle session he went: Were I French they’d call me Manufique/ So tyte I’m the Dalai Lama of music/ Yeah, my rhymes are sick… I’m yet to recover from that but hey, he’s my boy and I will always support him.” Who needs enemies when you have friends like these! Let’s be constructive. If it’s a bad performance, let the artist know. Who’s fooling who when you’re sitting through an uninspiring poetry session, a cringeworthy comedy show or a bad movie. And if you read a blog and it smacks of rubbish, offload in the ‘comment box’ for heaven’s sake! After all, terrible things happen when good people do nothing.
- Ignorance
They say it’s bliss but honestly, ignorance is the reason for so many wrongs. With the different media at our fingertips, everyone knows where the standard is. Either these people are looking to mediocrity for inspiration or they simply turned a blind eye when their peers gave the world gems like these:
Life’s a bitch but God forbid the bitch divorces me –Nas in the track, Life’s a bitch.
Would I have turned out to be nothing if Mama had not married Daddy? Would I not be the same Ofilwe I am now if Mama had never made it out of the dreaded location? What if Mama had chosen love, where would I be now? What would I be now? Nothing? – Ofilwe in Kopano Matlwa’s book, Coconut
Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re going to get. – Forrest Gump (Tom Hanks) in the movie, Forrest Gump
Whose cruel joke was it to put ‘s’ in ‘lisp’? – Savannah Dry Cider print ad
There are too many examples to illustrate where the standard is. Do yourself a favour: Watch the movie, Sideways. Make it a point not to miss the TV series Society, on SABC 1. YouTube ‘VW commercials’. Make Sunday Times’ Carlos Armato’s and Simnikiwe Xabanisa’s articles part of your weekly consumption. Go to your nearest CD store and ask for Common’s ‘One day it will all make sense’. Get your hands on Zapiro’s ‘Pirates of Polokwane’ and any Johnny Steinberg book. Go to a Trevor Noah comedy show. Hell, have a beer with degreed people!
- Attention-seeking
We all know of that kid. The one who doodles on the freshly painted wall with a crayon. All because no one gave him any attention. This time we are dealing with adults so a snotklap might not be the solution. Neglecting to stay true to thyself is the main reason why grown-ass men and women go to the extreme to get noticed. A friend might be a great rugby player but that doesn’t mean I have to throw my scrawny self into the scrum. When you find something that you love, a task you can complete with your eyes closed, an occupation where your being is not compromised and your family name comes out intact; you will rise. There are many way to appreciate the written word. And no one will hold it against you if you limit your creativity to Facebook status updates.
At the end of the day it’s more than about the trees.
Please, think about the children.
Put that pen down.
P.S. Due to their 3-brain cells nature, Daily Sun reporters and SMS-spk writers (God bless them or is it, GBT?) are exempt from my wrath.
